Let’s Talk About Optics

Enough with the pussy hats! Okay? If we’re really going to smash the patriarchy, my sisters, if all who identify as women are truly going to stand, side by side, we have to do what that patriarchy rarely does. We have to listen. Listen to the voices who said last year—and, told us again this year—this pink pussy thing doesn’t work for me. So. Just. Stop. (Related: And, c’mon! Let’s show some sensitivity, huh? Some R-E-S-P-E-C-T? Jeez!) So many powerful and insightful symbols out there. Let’s find a symbol that women of color and transgender women will applaud.

And let’s get to work. As a sign at Saturday’s Cambridge Common Women March nagged: “The patriarchy isn’t going to smash itself!”


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  1. Sistah, I hope this goes through. I left my longer heartfelt, detailed, and thorough comment but it didn’t go through. I don’t know what’s wrong. This happened a long time ago but eventually it corrected itself. Do you know why it isn’t working? Help if you can figure it out? 🙂 <3

  2. Dear Patricia,

    Well, hello, there, Patricia, and greetings and salutations to you and to you AND FOR VERY ESPECIALLY FOR YOU FOR ALWAYS, my awesomely precious and dearly special soul sistahfriend Christian Quaker woman who you’re FOR ALWAYS so, so very much!!!!! 🙂 <3 Sistah, I'm trying again to leave my longer, very heartlfet, detailed, and thorough thoughts, ideas, and comments-hopefully it will go through or instead I'll have to try a shorter summary. If the longer reply doesn't go through then hopefully it will start working again for the longer responses some time later. AWWWWWW, my so, so very absolutely AWESOME sistah and friend, Patricia, WOW here!!!! You've gone straight to this black woman's very heart and spirit with this beautiful, brilliantly beautiful straight from your very precious and special heart and spirit blog post article as you've supported, affirmed, acknowledged, recognized, and validated ME and other black women and women of color as you think it's vitally urgent, necessary, and important that the marchers have a more inclusive symbol that the hats with their pink color. WOW, my so, so very dear, dearest, precious Patricia, WOW, I just thank-YOU so, so very much, my so, so very dearest and darling friend!!!!! 🙂 <3 People must very much indeed listen to each other and learn the lessons from last year for all of us together in the great spirit of unity and solidarity to smash the patriarchy as you very wisely share and declare here. Sistah, I've all of the complete love for and confidence, faith, trust, hope, and belief in YOU, dearest Patricia, and in other marvelous white women so, so very much loving and cherishing each and every one of you and thinking so, so very highly of all of you and that you all can learn, heal, and grow even more toward anti-racist racial awareness, Patricia! 🙂 <3 I know that there are some people who happen to be white women who remain racist, oppressive, and negative but there are BY FAR very, very much more other so, so very right on, wondrously wonderful white women who with a deeply sincere heart and spirit! 🙂 <3 I'd NEVER EVER let those very few people who happen to be white women being racist, oppressive, and negative cause me to stereotype all white women because there are BY FAR very, very many more other precious white women so, so very dear and earnest! 🙂 <3 I so, so very much love and cherish YOU, my sweet white sistah, Patricia, and other absolutely SUPER white women, and I'll FOR ALWAYS give all of you without a moment's hesitation or reservation such well-deserved, unlimited chances!!!!!! 🙂 <3 Good white women can for sure be found, Patricia!!!!!! 🙂 <3 I've all of the very time and all of the very patience in the world to work with YOU, my so, so very dear friend, Patricia, and with other absolutely FANTASTIC white women. It is perfectly okay, normal, natural, and alright to be imperfect along all of your very gradual, imperfect lifetime's paths and journeys as each of you as such SUPERB white women go through all of your very processing with all of this!!!!! 🙂 <3 I will FOR ALWAYS just so, so very much love and cherish each and every one of you as such spectacular white women and I just truly think, feel, believe, and feel that you all are just splendid thinking so, so very highly of all of you with each and every one of you being my BY VERY FAR my very favorites among white people AND ALSO my BY VERY FAR my very favorites among all people in general!!!!!! 🙂 <3 YOU ALL as such special and wonderful white women can for sure FOR ALWAYS count on me to root for each and every one of you and to very delightfully and eagerly as well cheer all of you on and I make the commitment to work with each and every one of you in the long haul EVEN in those difficult, messy, complicated, and hard places, Patricia!!!!!! 🙂 <3 I'm here for YOU, Patricia, my sweet white sistahfriend, I'm here for all of you FOR ALWAYS as such awesome white women and I just have such complete love for AND ALSO confidence in each and every one of you that you all VERY MUCH INDEED can do this!!!!!! 🙂 <3

    My sistahfriend, I've so wanted to tell you about something amazing I did. Wednesday of last week on January 24 I had lunch with one of my local white sistahfriends. Then we went to her house and I visited with her. Later another local white sistahfriend came over. We watched the very empowering and enlightening video called, Mirrors Of Privilege: Making Whiteness Visible. WOW, was this such a powerful film!!!!! I so enjoyed having lunch with the first white sistah and then enjoyed spending the time with both of these dear local sisters and watching this very compelling film. Some things from the video just struck out to me, sister. Sister, there was a point in this very fine and excellent video when Dr. Peggy McIntosh said that something happened in 1980 when a couple of black women I'm thinking from what I remember said to her that working with white women is oppressive. WOW, my very, very heart and spirit so hurt from that, just sank and ached from the comments by the two black women. For ME as the black woman who I am I've always all of my life had much more of a comfort zone with astounding white people, very, very especially white women, and I've always had such a love for and outreach to white persons, very, very especially white women. I know that when I was a lot younger when I was less healthy I had a little discomfort with awesome white with some unresolved hurts that I had but I've always all of my life have had and continue to have WAY MORE of a comfort zone. I DEFINITELY DON'T think that working with white women is oppressive as the black woman who I am. I just don't agree with those other black women and I just cannot relate. Then there was another point in this very powerful video when it was said that a black woman said that for her to reach out to someone white to be her friend that for her as a black woman it's like crawling on her knees across broken glass. I DEFINITELY DO NOT feel that way as the black woman who I am. I just don't agree with this other black woman and I just cannot relate, Patricia!!!!! 🙂 <3 Sisterfriend, YOU Patricia, and other marvelous white women are my very life and eternal joys and blessings, and what a so, so very joy, honor, blessing, and pleasure to have each and every one of you in my very life, my very heart, my very spirit!!!!!! 🙂 <3 WOW!!!!!! YAY!!!!!! YAY YAY YAY YAY!!!!! Patricia, I thank-YOU and Spirit continually FOR YOU and FOR YOUR VERY PRESENCE IN MY VERY LIFE!!!!! 🙂 <3 YAY for YOU, Patricia!!!!!!! YAY for our very sisterhood and friendship, Patricia!!!!!! WOW!!!!! YAY!!!!!! YAY YAY YAY YAY!!!!! Now I feel even better and brighter with even more greatly added cheer after very joyfully reading this very encouraging and emboldening blog post article and joyously responding with my very heartfelt, detailed, and thorough thoughts, ideas, and comments!!!!! 🙂 <3 Sistahfriend, by the time you read this it will be Thursday so please have such a totally thrilling and terrific Thursday, a wondrously wonderful weekend ahead, and may all of your very days be so, so very especially blessed, Patricia!!!!! 🙂 <3 Sistah, it really helped for me to write to you and your blog because with my constantly flaring up chronic pain I had a bad foot and leg pain and cramp which work me up and I couldn't fall back to sleep so it helps me so to write to awesome YOU, Patricia, and your inspirational blog rather than continuing to toss and turn to no avail. UGH!!!!!! Spirit so, so very much loves and cherishes YOU A WHOLE LOT, Patricia, AND SO DO I A WHOLE LOT AND A WHOLE BUNCH,TOO, my friend!!!!! 🙂 <3

    Very Warmly and Sincerely FOR ALWAYS, my awesomely special and dearly precious FOR ALWAYS soul sistahfriend Christian Quaker white woman who you're FOR ALWAYS so, so very much, Patricia, sisterfriend of mine, with My and Spirit's VERY PEACE AND LOVE FOR YOU FOR ALWAYS, sister of mine, AND WITH SUCH BLESSINGS AND SUCH VERY EVEN MORE BLESSINGS FOR YOU FOR ALWAYS, friend of mine, 🙂 <3

    YOURS FOR ALWAYS soul sistahfriend Christian black woman AND FOR ALWAYS in the very great spirit of unity and solidarity, Sherry Gordon in Iowa City, Iowa 🙂 <3

  3. Ooops, my so, so very absolutely AWESOME sistah, Patricia, I’m trying to add to my comments here but it won’t go through. I wonder what’s wrong? It’ll probably correct itself later and at a later date start letting my longer comments go through like it did a long time ago when it temporarily wouldn’t let me put in my longer comments unless you know what’ wrong if you’re able to help? I’ll try posting somewhere else on the latest blog you wrote, my precious sistahfriend, Patricia!!!!!! 🙂 <3

  4. Oops, sistah, I tried again but it won’t go through. I won’t give up and I’ll keep trying. I’ll also add my additional comments on Facebook so that you can read them, my absolutely WONDERFUL sistah and friend, Patricia! 🙂 <3

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